Virus In Training


A fake small site sales letter template by mozey
February 26, 2007, 10:24 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , ,

High there, if you are reading this letter. Then you probably are wondering as to what this is all about. Keep reading and your life will change 360 degrees.

This letter is a quick template of all small websites which sell you crap that NO ONE NEEDS. The product which i will attempt to sell is THIS VERY POST’S POPULARITY!. My purpose behind this is to try to spread the word among people who STILL pay for useless scrap on-line.

These small websites are usually promoted by PPC adds. Usually starts off by few paragraphs that EVERYONE can relate to. So far i have accomplished that by reminding you of what of websites i’m talking about. You have heard about them? sure you have!.

Somewhere down the list of the first few paragraphs. I will ask you a set of questions that will invoke a SERIOUS emotion in your hart, and SOMEHOW tie that up with what i’m trying to sell you:

  • Can you get over the lost of a loved one?
  • Do you wish you can say to your kids, “Sure, vacation this summer it is!”?
  • Are you afraid of tomorrow? (I actually saw this question!, who the hell is’nt?)

At this stage of the letter, you are probably a bit tender. Ready for an emotional release. So i take the opportunity and try to make up a whole bunch of logical mombo jumbo that serves ONLY ME!. However, using simple misdirection, i’ll make you think that will be super man. I’m about to deminstrate that.

These websites are all over the place. I feel like SH1T for the poor and vulnerable people who fall into this trap. Now, what i want to do is, establish this letter as an example for potential victims to be aware off. The more people who will read this post, the more familiar they will be with the format of these types of scams. I am not claiming that i will clean the Internet. But if i can let,,,,, i donno!, a thousand people not to buy this CRAP. Then i will make the a55holes running these websites about $50,000 less richer. Of-course, the more success the better.

So what do we have here so far!, i just sold you an idea without you knowing really!. So i’m going to rephrase my pitch a way that will guilt trip you into saying yes, Not only that, but i will also make you feel stupid for saying NO to not go with me.

Here it goes, you don’t poor people with low IQ to wast their money that they should be saving in dumb stuff on-line so other a55hole gets richer do you?, you can go ahead and spread the word, but seriously!, do you have the time? How abut the money? it is a VERY hard and difficult process. Or, How would you feel if i told you, that you can save vulnerable and POOR people by simply sharing this post with a friend!?!, just send it to a friend by email or whatever method you would like. And rest assured that you have done your part to make sure that those a55holes don’t make money selling people sh1t they do not need.

At this point of the sales letter, you probably are ready to purchase! so will attempt to close the sale by having the ORDER NOW little form here:

viso logo

Maybe not? okay, so lets put some “time sensitivity” into this, we’ll use the old math trick. Think about this now!, you send one email to five friends who do the same!. This is 3125 emails by level five!. SO this is 3125 * $50 = $15,625 that you would have taken away from the hands of the scamers!!!!! Think about this!, every SECOND you let it go by, you are potentially giving these dipsh1ts $15K. So how about a purchase?

viso logo

If you still not convinced? how about some “testimonials” so here they are.

Anna-Margarita MacFarsin

I am 34 with 23 cats. I SHOULD’NT be trusted with money!, but crule fate has lead me a position where i’m making six figures income KNOWING the fact that i have the IQ of a Pez Dispenser,,,,,,, the older models!,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, a broken older model. Nasty world huh!?, either-ways, instead of purchasing a CD which makes me happy and sexy. I ended up giving all of my money to my boyfriend in Nigeria who’s mother is having a Love transplant surgery. We hav’nt met before, but hopefully soon 🙂

Danial Billy johns

I was really close to getting a piece of crap on-line, but a friend of mine forwarded me this fake letter, and now, i’m not going to.

Clinton Jazz

After being burned 59 times (this month), i’m NOT GOING TO PURCHASE ANY MORE crap from small rip off websites. Thanks to this post your reading.

Purchase now, make sure that your VOICE IS HEARD. Stop A55holes from legitimately taking your money. Increase your IQ count by !!!, enough for you not to get ANYTHING from ANY SMALL WEBSITE EVER AGAIN.

viso logo

Need more talking to!, thats cool, here is the hot part. ORDER IN THE NEXT LITTLE WHILE AND I WILL INCLUDE:

  • A good hand shake and a “way to go boss”
  • The opportunity to digg my story
  • An ebook which i will send to you upon your request

A $12389172039812 DOLLAR VALUE FOR FREE.
How about a decent warentee!?!?!, let me rephrase, a decent SOUNDING warentee. But it must have a hidden meaning which makes it useless in court.

100% WARENTEE

If you have forwarded this message to a friend and did not feel IMIDIATLY better about yourself as a human being. I will refund you every single penny you have paid for this product.

Order Today, Dont be gay, Smoke a jay, and find a lay.

 

viso logo

ou know!, i’m not saying that their products are all bad. Every once a while, i do see something which is ACTUALLY cool and worth purchasing. BUT, no one, and i mean NO ONE UNDER ANY CONDITIONS should be making financial decisions based on emotional feelings. And since these small websites will manipulate you emotionally, they are EVIL!. That’s what pimps and hustlers do!. Do not be tricked!

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3 Comments so far
Leave a comment

Nice article thanks!

Comment by Jake

That sounds fantastic. I want to know more. Can I send you some money?
Seriously, a cool clean article.
Thank you,

Nicholas

Comment by Nicholas Jury

[…] Good question, NOTHING, it was NOTHING. I got 404, so was bad_santa_3. For bad_Santa_2 however, i got this video. Kind of funny, but when the video was over!, i was directed to the “reverse funnel system“! PLEASE!, consider VERY carefully before proceeding. […]

Pingback by Cool note about digg’s title/url mapping « Virus In Training




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